Something Else for Texans to be Proud Of

texas-pride

http://www.salon.com/2014/02/20/how_long_americans_last_in_bed_state_by_state_partner/?source=huffpo

In Virginia, you might joke, “it sure is short, but at least it’s skinny.” However, to counter the statistics in the study, I’d say that they perhaps did not factor in the locality of Richmond’s propensity for dwelling in the past, so while the sex act might not last very long, we may spend a great deal more time than others engaged in reminiscing about how great sex used to be.

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5 Responses to “Something Else for Texans to be Proud Of”

  1. This could be because although we don’t much time on foreplay (Get in the back of the truck, woman!) it takes a while to get comfy back there. Or because Texas women usually have a loaded hand gun on the side table and “wham, bam, thanky ma’am” could easily turn into “wham, bam, kablam, kablam!” This does remind me of the time I was on an overseas flight from Texas seated next to an Italian and a Frenchman who began to brag to about their sex lives. The French guys says, “Last night I made love to my wife three times and this morning she made me crepes and told me I was magnifique in bed. The Italian guy says, “Last night I made love to my wife four times and this morning she made me an omelet and told me I must be the worlds greatest lover!” I ignored this until the Frenchman said, “and you, Texas, how many times did you make love to your wife last night?” I said, “Once.” “Ha! and what did she say to you in the morning?” I replied, “I think she said, “Don’t stop!”

  2. should have read, “don’t SPEND much time.” and began to brag not began to brag to. How do I go back and edit comments for typos like that. I was in a hurry because Johnetta Lou was in the next room calling for me. She can be very demanding and I don’t want her to try the spurs again, I mean it’s already a bit distracting when she calls out words like “giddyup!” or phrases like “Shit! Boy Howdy! I feel like I’ve been rode hard and put up wet!” At least she doesn’t needle me like my ex. I took the ex one time to see a friend of mine who had a prize bull he was real proud of. He told us that this particular bull had bred over 325 times in the past year. The ex laughed and said that I could sure take a few lessons from that bull. I just smiled and said, “Ask him if was all with the same cow!”

  3. You funny, Rotobra.

  4. Yes, he’ll be here all week, then he’ll be headlining at The Angry Standup in Des Moines.

    Click “The Daily Muse” at top left, choose Dashboard, then Comments. If you’re the author of the post you can edit comments.

  5. This line of comments made me think about a good old boy buddy of mine who has names for all his favorite sex positions like “The Cowboy”, “The Reverse Cowboy”, “The Dirty Sanchez” and “The Rusty Fish Hook” and others too kinky to describe on The Muse. He said his favorite was a sex position he called “The Rodeo Bronc” where you mount your gal from the rear, reach around and grab both her breasts and whisper in her ear, “These feel just like your sister’s!” Then you try to stay onboard for eight seconds.
    But seriously folks, I honor sex as an expression of love and a great way of becoming closer to someone you want to be close to. It should not be given or withheld as some kind of bargaining chip, some sort of a weapon or tool for gain other than intimate expressions of love. Despite my attempts at humor, I’m actually rather old fashioned in this regard. Thanks a lot! I’ll be here all week!

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